TJ HOWLETT

And the rain keeps coming down
Dark night on the overpass in this washed out town
One deep breath and move my feet
Once more easy victory ends in defeat
And I walk into the darkness
Again 

And the sun keeps beating down
Light shakes but the air is still on this broken ground
Breathe in dust and drag my feet
Once more taking on a fight that I can’t beat
And I walk into the fire
Again 

And the wind keeps cutting bone
Voices words that are almost heard leave me more alone
Tuck my head keep pushing through
Once more I hurt myself thinking of you
And I fade into the distance
Again

Born in a four wall in the mountains
Son of a proud and battered line
My daddy sold his lungs, his power
Cutting 6 and 14 down the mine
Momma kept a tidy household
Iron stove bubbling beans
Hands scrubbing at the table
Chipped and cracked but spotless clean

Grandpa's coughing in the corner
Granny choked away last year
At peace at last the preacher told us
No more burdens, no more fear
We played in muck and rock and tailings
We breathed the black dust as we played
Learned our letters at the schoolhouse
Every night we knelt and prayed

Every Sunday was a rest day
We got up early, dressed up well
Head down kneeling, all those sinners
Being told why they're set for Hell
Then that day the timber cracking
As the cloud blew out I up and left
I'm smoking drinking fighting fucking
I’ll cut my own damn way to a sinners death

Daddy was a drinking man, yeah he sang his blues
Through alcohol and anger, that was all that he knew
Never met a bottle that he couldn't get through
Always had a reason for what he couldn't do
And Momma sang to Jesus, prayed long and hard
While Daddy drank his whiskey at the bottom of the yard
But Jesus never answered, he never took a look
So she could only go by what was written in the book

Union is forever, love honour and obey
Words that looked like comfort in the safety of the day
But they took a different meaning in the absence of the light
When he rolled in drunk and angry in the middle of the night
And still she sang to Jesus while he whittled at her soul
Making her the reason he was crawling down that hole
But Jesus never answered, he never lent a hand
While every day she sank a little deeper in the sand

My brother, he's a thinker, got a job and moved away
You never see him out here in the weatherboard these days
My sister, she's a feeler, the anger cut her deep
She lives chasing nothing walking upright and asleep
I ain't got no Jesus, where I can run and hide
When the Preacher buried Momma, I called him for a lie
Me, I've got my anger, I sing it through my blues
And when I'm finished singing it's the bottle that I choose